LifestylePsychologyShopping

Is it appropriate to ask for a particular present?

Many people are rather concerned about asking another person for giving him or her a particular present. According to popular believes and social standards, people are supposed to be happy because of getting any present no matter whether it really brings pleasure to its receiver or not. Of course, it is the attention from another person what matters most of all.

Yet, it is not so obvious whether people should tell each other what exactly they want to get as a present. This article will give you some new perspectives of this issue.

Asking for a particular present will help you to avoid guilt for not being happy about the gift

In the reality, not all of the presents are bringing us joy and the reason for it not the price one has paid for a particular thing. Actually, it is the fact, this person has not given us the attention we were longing for even though he or she has given us a present.

Certainly, if the present is given by a person with whom we do not have any close relations, it is normal to treat it just as an act of politeness and there is no need to expect anything personalised. Yet, when it comes to our family, partners and close friends, these people know our preferences at least to some degree. Then, it might be rather disappointing to find out they are buying presents for us without paying attention to any information they know about us. It is especially frustrating to see that a person has just purchased anything he or she has seen in the store first. Needless to say, such a behaviour has nothing to do with attention to it.

The problem is that it is a receiver who feels responsible for one’s negative emotions caused by such a present. Generally, people tend to feel guilty for not being able to feel the excitement about getting such a present.

Making it easier for a person to choose a present for you

Asking for a particular present makes most of the people uncomfortable because we actually do not know how much another person is planning to spend on it and we are also not sure whether this individual has already made some plan for purchasing a present for us. Certainly, knowing we would prefer something else might make the person change all of the shopping plans.

It can be possible, however, in the reality, many people would prefer looking for a particular item knowing it will bring the receiver happiness rather than spend countless hours looking for something special without having any guarantee another person will like it. From this perspective, telling people about our exact wishes can be a better option.

Also, you should not forget about the expectations of many people who are giving present for their receivers to be using these items in the future. For that reason, telling another person what is your wish for a present, will help you to avoid a situation in which you feel obliged to use something you genuinely do not like.

Surprises are not necessarily pleasant

Undeniably, if you tell another person about what you want to get as a present, this present will not be a surprise any more, however, it is crucial to understand that not all of the surprises are the same. Indeed, what is good about getting something unexpected that you neither like nor know how to utilise? The most important part of surprises is not that the receiver of such a present is taken aback by something unexpected. It is the surprise because someone has got for you something you had always wanted to have even though you had never asked about that. Certainly, this is what is making a surprise amazing. Yet, it rarely happens in the reality because it is extremely difficult to guess such things without any help from another person.

Needless to say, you will feel really uneasy if a person who was planning to make a surprise for you spent lots of time looking for a present and eventually bough something you actually do not like.

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